A letter to my Strong Single Black Women (A collaboration with Lacy Colson III)
To all of the Strong Single Black Women, please make yourself known. Black men need you now more than ever, we require your attention to detail, your ability to keep us in check and your unconditional love. To the single sisters out in the world working diligently to get an education, become homeowners, to prevail in a society that rarely recognizes you, please know that your strength is necessary for the survival of black men.
Do not grow discouraged by the women that degrade and cheapen themselves by plastering their bodies all over social media for attention. In the same breath, do not allow the men that seek those types of women convince you that your standards are too high. Understand your worth and allow your confidence to shine through without uttering a single word. You will be tested and taken for granted often, but take it with a grain of salt and turn those heartbreaks into life lessons. Use them as opportunities to grow and become even stronger.
To the hardworking sister that’s juggling a full-time job and classes at night all while being a loving mother, you matter and you are loved. We black men need you more than you can fathom. Know that there’s a strong single black man searching for you. He is a man that will be consumed with making you happy and dedicated to making your life less hectic. Do not compromise your intellect out of fear that you will make a man feel inferior or insecure, a real man, even if not college educated, will allow you to challenge his intellect and actually learn from you.
The world has changed vastly and so have the expectations of what a real woman is. You may not be a perfect fit to everyone’s description, but as long as you’re true to yourself and your values, nothing else matters.
You are an amazing presence that should be celebrated, protected, and loved; though this isn’t always the case please continue to grow and trust that there’s purpose at the end of every struggle. Your strength and tenacity allows you to be the backbone of your families and is meant to complement the strength of the man you will bless as a wife someday.
We are in the midst of a trying time in our society. The lives of black men are devalued as they’ve always been and our lives being taken away from us by public servants. We need you to make your presence felt by continuing to love, defend, and caring for us just as you have always done.
To the strong single sisters, if your eyes happen to skim these words, make no mistake that you are valued, loved and needed. Continue to be you and relish in the reality that what you were given naturally, other women endure surgery and other extreme measures in trying to emulate you. It is impossible to capture your essence and what you mean to black men so please be patient with us as our survival is contingent upon you continuing to be our backbone. Never undervalue or stop loving the woman in which you are. We still want you, and we’ve never stopped loving you.
Lacy Colson III
Lacy Colson III is a writer based in Greensboro, NC. He has recently married his Strong Black Woman and he actively parents two future Strong Black young men as well as two future Strong Black young ladies. You may find more of his work for Urban Image Magazine here. I am appreciative of his time and effort during this collaboration to include this piece within the Strong Black Series.